(LILIAN C. SCHEUER)

(L.C.S)

why? 
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why should i?
why should i?
why should i?
why should i?
why should i? 

why should i start writing? there’s no point in it anyways.
why should i start writing? there’s no one to read it anyways.
why should i start writing? nobody cares about it anyways.
why should i start writing? nobody cares what i think anyways.
why should i start writing? nobody cares about me anyways.

why should i write at all? there’s no point in it anyways.
why should i write at all? there’s no meaning to it anyways.
why should i write at all? it doesn’t serve any purpose anyways.
why should i search for a purpose? i just enjoy doing it anyways.
why should i stop writing? i just enjoy doing it anyways.
why should i stop writing? writing is my only vessel anyways.
why should i stop writing? writing is my only escape anyways.
why should i stop writing? writing is my only friend anyways.
why should i stop writing? writing is all that i have anyways.
why should i stop writing? i’ve already started now anyways.

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why should i create? there’s no point in it anyways.
why should i create? there’s no one to look at it anyways.
why should i create? there’s no one to feel it anyways.
why should i create? it won’t make me feel anyways.
why should i create? it won’t make me feel seen anyways.
why should i create? it won’t make me feel understood anyways.
why should i create? i am destined to be misunderstood anyways.
why should i create? no one understands my creations anyways.
why should i create? it won’t make you understand anyways.
why should i create? it won’t make you think anyways.
why should i create? it won’t make you cry anyways.
why should i create? it will only make me cry anyways.
why should i create? it won’t change my feelings anyways.
why should i create? it won’t change the world anyways.
why should i create? it won’t change anything anyways.

why should i create? i don’t contribute anything to society anyways.
why should i exist? i don’t contribute anything to society anyways.
why should i live? i don’t contribute anything to society anyways.

why should i?
why should i?
why should i?
why should i?
why should i? 

why should i not create? i couldn’t live without creating anyways.
why should i not create? it’s what i was created to do anyways.
why should i not create? there’s nothing else i can do anyways.
why should i not create? we all constantly create things anyways.
why should i not create? creating is a crucial part of life anyways.
why should i not create? creating makes me feel alive anyways.
why should i not create? without creating, i would die anyways.
why should i not create? my creations will never die anyways.
why should i not create? they will be all that’s left of me anyways.
why should i not create? i was born to be an artist anyways.
why should i not create? i will always be an artist anyways.
why should i not create? i am an artist anyways.

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why should i be an artist? there’s no point in it anyways.
why should i be an artist? there’s no meaning to it anyways.
why should i be an artist? it doesn’t serve any purpose anyways.
why should i search for a purpose? i just enjoy doing it anyways.
why should i not enjoy doing it? i am an artist anyways.

why should i identify as an artist? it doesn’t identify me anyways.
why should i identify as a sexuality? it doesn’t identify me anyways.
why should i identify as a gender? it doesn’t identify me anyways.
why should i identify as a species? it doesn’t identify me anyways.
why should i identify as a member? it doesn’t identify me anyways.
why should i identify as a piece? it doesn’t identify me anyways.
why should i identify as a fragment? it doesn’t identify me anyways.
why should i identify as a term? it doesn’t identify me anyways.
why should i identify as an idea? it doesn’t identify me anyways.
why should i identify as a box? it doesn’t identify me anyways.
why should i put myself in a box? it doesn’t identify me anyways.
why should i put anything in a box? it doesn’t identify me anyways.
why should i identify as anything? it doesn’t identify me anyways.
why should i identify as anything? it doesn’t change me anyways.
why should i identify as anything? i am just who i am anyways.

why should i be myself? i’m not sure who i am anyways.
why should i be myself? i don’t know what that means anyways.
why should i be someone else? i’m not sure who they are anyways.
why should i be someone else? they already exist anyways.
why should i be someone else? i’d rather just be myself anyways.
why should i be anything? i won’t be someday anyways.
why should i be anything? i will be nothing someday anyways.
why should i be nothing? i’m not sure if nothing exists anyways.
why should i know if it does? nobody really knows anyways.
why should i know anything? nobody can ever truly know anyways.
why should i know anything? i know that i know nothing anyways.
why should i know nothing? i haven’t seen it yet anyways.
why should i act like i know? the others already do that anyways.
why should i believe them? they don’t believe me either anyways.
why should i act like i care? it doesn’t matter anyways.
why should i act like i don’t care? it doesn’t matter anyways.
why should i act? it really doesn’t matter at all anyways.
why should i perform? i really don’t matter at all anyways.
why should i perform? there’s nobody to watch my show anyways.
why should i perform? i just want to live for myself anyways.

why should i?
why should i?
why should i?
why should i?
why should i? 

why should i identify as anything? i don’t know myself anyways. 
why should i identify as anything? i don’t fit inside a box anyways. 
why should i identify as anything? i won’t restrict myself anyways. 
why should i identify as anything? i just exist for myself anyways. 
why should i identify as anything? i don’t know if i exist anyways.
why should i know i exist? i can’t ever be sure of it anyways.
why should i know i exist? this might be a simulation anyways.
why should i know i exist? this might be a hallucination anyways.
why should i know i exist? this might be a dream anyways.
why should i know i exist? this might not even be me anyways.
why should i know if i am me? i don’t know myself anyways.
why should i know if i am me? i don’t know who i am anyways.
why should i know who i am? you couldn’t tell me either anyways.
why should i know who i am? i can’t define myself anyways. 
why should i define myself? i don’t want to anyways. 
why should i define myself? i am just who i am anyways.
why should i define myself? i just do what i feel like anyways.
why should i define myself? just being myself is more fun anyways.
why should i define myself? i don’t want to be defined anyways.
why should i define you? i can’t know who you really are anyways.
why should i define you? i can’t read your mind anyways.
why should i define you? i can’t listen to your thoughts anyways.
why should i define you? you can’t even define yourself anyways.
why should i define you? i don’t care about you anyways.
why should i define anyone? i don’t care about them anyways.
why should i be defined by them? i don’t care about them anyways.
why should i care about them? they don’t care about me anyways.
why should i be defined? they don’t care about me anyways.
why should i be defined? they don’t care who i am anyways.
why should i define myself? i don’t live for others anyways.
why should i define myself? i only live for myself anyways.
why should i define myself? i don’t have to for myself anyways.
why should i define myself? i will always just be myself anyways.
why should i define myself? my existence fits no labels anyways.
why should i define myself? labels are restrictive tools anyways.
why should i confine myself? i resist all restrictions anyways.
why should i confine myself? i am just who i am anyways.
why should i confine myself? i just want to be myself anyways.
why should i confine myself? i just want to exist anyways.
why should i confine myself? i just want to live my life anyways.

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why should i want to live? there’s no point in it anyways.
why should i want to live? there’s no meaning to it anyways.
why should i want to live? i don’t serve any purpose anyways.
why should i search for a purpose? i just enjoy doing it anyways.
why should i enjoy life? i don’t know if i really do anyways.

why should i know? i don’t know if i really do anyways.
why should i exist? i don’t know if i really do anyways.
why should i live? i don’t know if i really do anyways.

why should i?
why should i?
why should i?
why should i?
why should i? 

why should i identify as a person? it doesn’t identify me anyways.
why should i identify as a person? i’m not sure if i am anyways.
why should i identify as a person? i don’t feel like i am anyways.
why should i be a person? i don’t feel like one of them anyways.
why should i be a person? i don’t want to be one of them anyways.
why should i be a person? i’d rather just be a bird anyways.
why should i be a bird? i’d never get to fly away anyways.
why should i be a bird? i’m way too scared of heights anyways.
why should i be a bird? i don’t want to fly away anyways.
why should i want to fly away? it won’t end my suffering anyways.
why should i want to fly away? i know that i couldn’t anyways.
why should i want to fly away? i am my own bird cage anyways.
why should i fly away? i can’t escape my own head anyways.
why should i fly away? i can’t escape being myself anyways.
why should i fly away? i can’t escape being a person anyways.

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why should i want to be human? humans are miserable anyways.
why should i want to be human? humans hate everything anyways.
why should i want to be human? humans love nothing anyways.
why should i want to be human? humans only love hatred anyways.
why should i want to be human? humans only love to kill anyways.
why should i want to be human? humans kill animals anyways.
why should i want to be human? humans kill nature anyways.
why should i want to be human? humans kill the planet anyways.
why should i want to be human? humans kill each other anyways.
why should i want to be human? humans kill their home anyways.
why should i want to be human? humans kill their future anyways.
why should i want to be human? humans kill their joy anyways.
why should i want to be human? humans kill anything anyways.
why should i want to be human? humans kill everything anyways.
why should i want to be human? i don’t feel like i am anyways.

why should i?
why should i?
why should i?
why should i?
why should i? 

why should i be like them? they’re too different from me anyways.
why should i be like them? i prefer being myself anyways.
why should i be like them? i don’t understand them anyways.
why should i understand them? they don’t understand me anyways.
why should i be understood? i’m way too complicated anyways.
why should i be understood? i don’t like being analyzed anyways.
why should i be understood? i don’t strive to be grasped anyways.
why should i want to be? i don’t seek validation anyways.
why should i seek validation? i’m all that matters anyways.
why should i seek understanding? i’m all that matters anyways.
why should i seek intimacy? i’m all that matters anyways.
why should i seek friendship? i’m all that matters anyways.
why should i seek love? i’m all that matters anyways.
why should i seek social interaction? i’m all that matters anyways.
why should i seek anything? i’m all that matters anyways. 
why should i talk to others? i’m all that matters anyways. 
why should i talk to others? i already talk to myself anyways.
why should i talk to others? i understand myself better anyways.
why should i talk to others? i really don’t like them anyways.
why should i talk to you? i really don’t like you anyways.
why should i like you? my feelings don’t matter anyways.
why should i like anyone? my feelings don’t matter anyways.
why should i like anyone? i really don’t know if i do anyways.
why should i like myself? i really don’t know if i do anyways.
why should i want to be liked? i’d never know if it’s true anyways.
why should i want to be liked? i don’t live to be liked anyways.
why should i want to be liked? i don’t live for anyone else anyways.
why should i want to be liked? i just live for myself anyways.
why should i not like myself? i’m all that matters anyways.
why should i not like myself? i’m all that i have anyways.
why should i not like myself? i’m all that exists anyways.
why should i not like you? you are just a version of me anyways.
why should i not like anything? it’s all a reflection of me anyways.
why should i hate anything? that’s just like hating myself anyways.
why should i hate myself? i could just love myself instead anyways.
why should i not love myself? it’s the only true love anyways.
why should i not love myself? i’m all that i’ll ever have anyways.
why should i not love myself? i can only trust myself anyways.
why should i trust the others? i can’t tell if they’re honest anyways.
why should i be able to tell? i can only trust myself anyways.
why should i know if i can trust myself? i can’t really tell anyways.
why should i trust myself? i don’t understand myself anyways.
why should i trust myself? sometimes i feel like i can’t anyways.
why should i trust myself? i might be lying to myself anyways.
why should i know if i’m lying? i don’t understand myself anyways.

why should i listen to myself? i don’t have a clue anyways.
why should i listen to you? you don’t have a clue either anyways.
why should i listen to my family? they don’t have a clue anyways.
why should i listen to my friends? they don’t have a clue anyways.
why should i listen to my mum? she doesn’t have a clue anyways.
why should i listen to my dad? i don’t have one anyways.
why should i listen to the others? they don’t have a clue anyways.
why should i listen to the people? they don’t have a clue anyways.
why should i listen to the crowd? they don’t have a clue anyways.
why should i listen to authorities? they don’t have a clue anyways.
why should i listen to teachers? they don’t have a clue anyways.
why should i listen to professors? they don’t have a clue anyways.
why should i listen to scientists? they don’t have a clue anyways.
why should i listen to doctors? they don’t have a clue anyways.
why should i listen to politicians? they can’t be trusted anyways.
why should i listen to my thoughts? they can’t be trusted anyways.
why should i listen to my thoughts? they will only hurt me anyways.
why should i listen to my thoughts? they’re not even real anyways.
why should i listen to my thoughts? they’re a part of me anyways.
why should i listen to myself? i can’t be trusted anyways.
why should i listen to myself? i know that i’m clueless anyways.
why should i listen to myself? i know that i know nothing anyways.
why should i listen to myself? i don’t understand myself anyways.
why should i listen to myself? i know it’s just my thoughts anyways.
why should i listen to myself? it’s all just inside my head anyways.

why should i keep writing? it’s all just inside my head anyways.
why should i keep writing? i’m already getting tired of it anyways.
why should i keep writing? there’s no point in it anyways.
why should i keep writing? there’s no one to read it anyways.
why should i keep writing? there’s so much for me to do anyways.

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why should i do all those things? i don’t feel like it anyways.
why should i do all those things? i’m feeling too tired anyways.
why should i do all those things? i don’t want to do them anyways.
why should i want to do them? i don’t want to do anything anyways.
why should i want to do anything? there’s no point in it anyways.
why should i do anything? there’s no point in it anyways.
why should i do anything? i’m feeling too tired anyways.
why should i do anything? i’m always feeling tired anyways.
why should i do anything? i’d rather lay down in bed anyways.
why should i do anything? i’d rather lay down forever anyways.
why should i not? sometimes i feel like i’m dead already anyways.
why should i not? i might be dead already anyways.
why should i not? i wish i was dead already anyways.
why should i not? i’m feeling too tired to live anyways.
why should i not? i don’t want to do anything at all anyways.

why should i?
why should i?
why should i?
why should i?
why should i? 

why should i eat? i will get hungry again anyways.
why should i drink? i will get thirsty again anyways.
why should i breathe in? i will breathe out again anyways.
why should i sleep? i will feel tired again anyways.
why should i dream? i will wake up again anyways.
why should i build? i will destroy again anyways.
why should i repair? i will break again anyways.
why should i push? i will pull again anyways.
why should i show? i will hide again anyways.
why should i acknowledge? i will ignore again anyways.
why should i give? i will take again anyways.
why should i find? i will lose again anyways.
why should i come? i will go again anyways.
why should i win? i will lose again anyways.
why should i rise? i will fall again anyways.
why should i ignite? i will burn out again anyways.
why should i recharge? i will wear out again anyways.
why should i grow? i will decay again anyways.
why should i flourish? i will wither again anyways.
why should i start? i will give up again anyways.
why should i try? i will fail again anyways.
why should i have hope? i will lose it again anyways.
why should i believe? i will doubt again anyways.
why should i remember? i will forget again anyways.
why should i care? i will be hurt again anyways.

why should i clean my apartment? it will get dirty again anyways.
why should i clean my toilet? it will get dirty again anyways.
why should i clean my thoughts? it will get dirty again anyways.
why should i clean my conscience? it will get dirty again anyways.
why should i clean my mind? it will get dirty again anyways.

why should i wash the dishes? i’ll have to do it again anyways.
why should i wash my clothes? i’ll have to do it again anyways.
why should i wash my hair? i’ll have to do it again anyways.
why should i make my bed? i’ll have to do it again anyways.
why should i take a shower? i’ll have to do it again anyways.
why should i brush my teeth? i’ll have to do it again anyways.
why should i do anything? i’ll have to do it again anyways.
why should i do anything? there’s always something to do anyways.
why should i do anything? the tasks will never end anyways.
why should i do anything? my to-do list will never end anyways.
why should i do anything? my thoughts will never end anyways.
why should i do anything? my suffering will never end anyways.
why should i do anything? it will never come to an end anyways.
why should i do anything? i just want it to come to an end anyways.
why should i do anything? i just want to come to an end anyways.  

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why should i water my plants? they will die away anyways.
why should i build friendships? they will die away anyways.
why should i hold onto anything? it will die away anyways.
why should i try to be inspired? it will die away anyways.
why should i try to stay motivated? it will die away anyways.
why should i try to have hope? it will die away anyways.
why should i try to be positive? it will die away anyways.
why should i try to change my mind? it will die away anyways.
why should i try to do better? it will die away anyways.
why should i try to be better? it will die away anyways.
why should i try to get better? i will die away anyways.
why should i try to take care of myself? i will die away anyways.
why should i try to live? i will die away anyways.
why should i try at all? i will die away anyways.
why should i try? i will just die in the end anyways.
why should i not? i don’t want to live forever anyways.
why should i not want to die? death is a part of life anyways.
why should i not want to die? i’m frightened of eternity anyways.
why should i not be? i despise the concept of forever anyways.
why should i not? i don’t want to live forever anyways.
why should i want to live forever? this place is not forever anyways.
why should i want to live forever? nothing lasts forever anyways.
why should i want to live forever? everything has to end anyways.
why should i want to live forever? i’d get tired of it anyways.
why should i want to live forever? i’m already tired of it anyways.

why should i want to live forever?
why should i want to live today? 
why should i want to live my life?
why should i want to live at all?
why should i want to live?

why should i?
why should i?
why should i?
why should i?
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why should i feel happy? 
why should i feel sad? 
why should i feel angry? 
why should i feel scared?   
why should i feel confused? 
why should i feel overwhelmed? 
why should i feel lonely?
why should i feel lost?
why should i feel empty? 
why should i feel indifferent? 
why should i feel insignificant? 
why should i feel irrelevant? 
why should i feel invisible? 
why should i feel dispensable? 
why should i feel anything? 

why should i feel lonely? i’ve chosen this life for myself anyways.
why should i feel lost? i’ve chosen this life for myself anyways.
why should i feel empty? i’ve chosen this life for myself anyways.

why? 
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why should i stop writing? i could just go on anyways.
why should i stop creating? i could just go on anyways.
why should i stop being myself? i could just go on anyways.
why should i stop existing? i could just go on anyways.
why should i stop living? i could just go on anyways.

why should i?
why should i?
why should i?
why should i?
why should i?

why should i try to get better? it won’t get better anyways.
why should i want to get better? it won’t get better anyways.
why should i get better? nothing ever gets better anyways.
why should i be happy? i know that it won’t get better anyways.
why should i be happy? there’s nothing to be happy about anyways.
why should i be happy? there’s bad things happening anyways.
why should i be happy? there are people dying everyday anyways.
why should i be happy? there is war and suffering anyways.
why should i be happy? there is inequity and injustice anyways.
why should i be happy? there is pain and sorrow anyways.
why should i be happy? so many people are unhappy anyways.
why should i not be happy? so many people are unhappy anyways.
why should i not be happy? it won’t make them happier anyways.
why should i not be happy? my sadness won’t save them anyways.
why should i not be happy? i could just enjoy life instead anyways.

why should i be happy?
why should i be alive?
why should i be anything?

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why should i laugh? 
why should i cry? 
why should i smile? 
why should i frown? 
why should i love?
why should i hate?
why should i believe?
why should i doubt?
why should i hope?
why should i try?
why should i care?
why should i feel?
why should i do?
why should i be?
why should i live?

why should i?
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why should i not?

© 2025 LILIAN C. SCHEUER